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An ode to Facebook ‘friends’…

February 27, 2014

“Chloe: whose determination to have more Facebook friends than anyone else lost her all her friends”

Like many children of her age,

Chloe loves her Facebook page.

But unlike most, poor Chloe seems

To take her Facebook to extremes.

She can’t think or cry or chortlefacebook photo

Unless it’s through Facebook’s portal.

To be online just seems so right

At any time of day or night.

Offline, her world is just a blur:

Her Facebook friends are real to her.

They poke her, ‘like’ her, check her feed

And hang on every word and deed.

Her total count of friends to date?

Nine hundred and seventy-eight.

Twenty-two more would be just ‘grand’ –

That’s her next status update planned!

Then there’s the ‘chat’ and all the games –

Farmville, The Sims – you know the names.

Facebook’s life without the dross.

It’s not for you? Then that’s your loss!

Chloe thinks she’s totally cool,

Blanking all the kids at school

(except for Emma, a Facebook friend,

her classmates drive her round the bend).

It’s true that bowling sounds like fun,

As does a picnic in the sun.

These she ignores without a flicker:

She craves a world that updates quicker.

So forget that party – nix that meal;

Forgo that concert – no big deal!

Who cares that Chloe has no chums?

She will, you see, when the time comes.

Moral: Friends are people you can count on – not count.


–           ©Mitchell Symons, excerpt from “Happily Never After … modern cautionary verse”.


Remember all, if you get any nasty comments aimed at you on Facebook, block that sender!  Trolling, or online bullying, is not OK.


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